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Don't change instrumental - Musiq soulchild



Starts on 23 sec's. link to inst. on bottom



When time is done knocking at my door,
and visions stop blurring me,
imma try to pick myself up of the floor,
long enough to see where I'm heading,
cause life is nothing more than ups and downs,
to see what were truly made of,
who's to say that the reasons aren't there, to walk towards the light we all fear


but I'm stronger, defeated monsters,
that you haven't seen in your wildest dreams,
nights were fonder, felt warmer,
when you weren't just a distant memory

I'm stronger, defeated monsters,
that you haven't seen in your wildest dreams,
nights were fonder, felt warmer,
when you weren't just a distant memory,


tell who me who i have to kill,
to show you what i feel deep in my heart cant be concealed,
cause time, cause time was on my side,
felt it in my veins, seen it thru my eyes,
oh stop the reasons why, from clouding up my mind,
cause the signs were all there, written in the air
in swirls of content but those i managed to smear.

and tho i try to contain it, try contain it
it just leaks out thru the cracks
although my life seems Jaded,
it's faded by the thought of you never comin back

and tho i try to contain it, try contain it
it just leaks out thru the cracks
although my life seems Jaded,
faded by the thought of you never comin back


moments i missed,
that first kiss,
what could of been and what if
could of changed for the better if i just would of stayed

moments i missed,
a second kiss,
you were my heaven fallen gift
but then i breath again and know your gone for good


but I'm stronger, defeated monsters,
in my wildest dreams,
nights were fonder, felt warmer,
now just a distant memory

but I'm stronger, defeated monsters,
in my wildest dreams,
nights were fonder, felt warmer,
but your just a distant memory



LINK-->
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HadVf57sPFM



Song; not rap lol. This was something i only had the first two words written in a note pad in my room from like 3-4 years ago, decided to finish it cause nothing in life worth remembering is worth forgetting. Never regret something squishy that once made u smile.

From my heart




We have one life, one chance to make a change, to leave a foot print in the sand, see who we are, set an example, fall in love, dream our dreams, change our changes, live our life the way we want to, im not talking about clothing or fast cars.. no.

i mean those things that make you literally see your soul in the mirror. i crave life; i desire it, i've been thru so much to not be anyone in this lifetime.

no i dont know if theres a God, or if were all just part of a never ending cycle, all i know is that i want to live. My life; 20 years have bought me to this moment. i've had nightmares wide awake tonight reliving the past, the fights, the beatings, the humiliations, the torment, the day i almost lost my life from a stray bullet, the day i swore i wouldnt walk again for about a month lying in a hospital bed, the struggles, the pain, the anguish.

I've had my body go into relapse right before my eyes tonight, i broke myself down, no.. not like before, i sat here and asked myself questions, real definitive questions, questions no one but me can ask myself.

i am strong, i am weak, i am able, i am condemned, i am forsaken, i am loved.

this is the only true definition of life, love, lust, emotions, without emotions we wouldn't see the beauty in what we treasure most, what attracts us to our soul mate if thats what you want to call it, cause for they are also in a journey of self seeking empowerment.

never forget; we and we only are the director, writer, actor in our own play & must choose to freely exemplify how we endear it. in this hectic life we must take a stand and just fall victim to the flowing wind that drifts us to where we want to be.



this is my legacy, this is my sound, this is the ever beating flash of abundance that's rebound,
from hill top, to capitol chivalry, i want to be remembered by who i came to be.

Nas-The world is yours instrumental.



Starts at 27 secs.


Know I'm the swift lyrical Gandhi, spit on the corner,
keep it movin trespassing my mind see' it's a crime g,
get's you no where, I'm ignorant? Au contrair,
are you confused by frequency of what's under the hair,
spark again' genius,
feel it in the air like Sinclair in the stairs got rocked by his lair, it wasn't fair.
they was eyin him before he ever even fuckin got there,
40 minutes later all you hearin is helicopters.
so i wear what i see as a shield, cause life's nothing more than wrong right's, turn the wheel.

and strike a deal,
stay real, not dolled up,
fake niggas flop, get crushed then get rolled up,
blown up's the mission, im in tip top condition,
to make surgical incisions makin niggas need physicians

who's world is this? (it's yours)
it's mine, it's mine, it's mine.

Angels Beat.



Angeles tocando mi ventana,
por la manana, de madrugada y cuando el sol no salga,
se approvechan de mis pensamientos, te cuento,
que no quieren que me llegue un mal que yo presiento,
viene por la esquina, me dicen mira,
date alas que de aqui no saldras tu con vida,
attencion no pongo,
porque mi destino yo lo escribo siendo el tipo con clandestino a siempre ser un idolo,
asi que me quedo yo, escalando la fortuna hasta que personalmente yo vea a dios.
se te'eleve, y crece tu sense's, te arrepiente's, de no saber que soy aquel que llega a ser tu Jefe.
detente, soy Jerente por ahora, llego la hora de hacer mi's movimiento's y agarro mi pistola.
le reso a la virgen, salgo por la puerta, con esperanza en mis bolzillos, confundidamente sencillo.

The Ghost




I'm tired of coppin second hand, moping thru the land,
right and wrong's a curved path, straight fittin hand in hand,
thought's make me a bad man, action's keep me stranded,
but that's all gonna change when my brother jay's landed,
takin over, no game's, we aint into gettin fame,
only money's the objective & soon's the time frame,
fat pocket's, haze induced note's, i feen to cop a rain coat,
to sell to the leprechaun that sits under the rainbow.

smart cat's with the intelligence to make so many president's,
the white house goes broke for the plain fact we so diligent,
perfect sense, we militant, too much time in a residence,
make's your soul convert into a money hungry sentient,
no hesitance to bang your head against pipes that medicine,
won't ever calm the pain of us bringin upon the genesis,
remember who jumped up in it, stole the game simplistic,
faster heartbeat's than a new york minute, Omen.

Black Zombie instrumental. Boredom.




It's impossible for you to match up to my cappadon,
your outta place, in my state, like Martha Stuart in the amazon,
fact's are, im born, bred, raised, smokin haze
queens my home, place of drive by shoot out's on sunny days
hard truth is many don't come back,
so we keep their flame's lit & keep on pressin on cause this is combat
no Vietnam, more like desert storm,Generation kill..
don't blink, travel in swarms, keep the corner's payin bill's

it's like the sounds from my cipher bled,
got the city crying murder cause senior citizen's is all loosin they oxygen
my neighborhood need's analyzing
cause big enterprises, wanna build condo's, knockin shelter's buildin franchises
time's a frame on the wall where the picture's 3D,
on the other side it's hollow, we choose what we wanna see,
turn a cheek, ignore fact's or take us a leap of faith,
no one said it'd be easy, gotta drop the crime rate,
cause we makin our own body bag's,
never know when it's our time nd who take's us out, might be ur other half
in fact
think past, the past, look forward, ull see what i mean by the way relationship's last

everything come's to an end, fairy tale's it's all pretend,
bullshit, mind prospers where they set the blind trend's,
again, send them to fend for they selves,
out in my part of town' get turn into retail ,
forget all detail's, minor scratch on windshield,
stay quiet till you bout to blow then up and raise hell,

Random Inspiration

The physics of notes,
weather the storm of flashing forward engulfment's
when traveling on this paved long road of dysfunction,
swiveling movements gracefully gracing your indulgence,
while i make your acquaintance your telling me you enjoy this,
i cant control this,
this character building Sinatra feeling of blissful devotion,
cranked and filled with emotion,
explosion's free me from ties to reality which i rewind to relive like I'm the master of what I'm holding.


Day's feel harder.




I sat here by the innocence of my own company,
Dismembering myself,
Counting every blessing, every well given prosper thought,
Every situation that has led me to this moment,
I cried, i laughed, i pondered in great sadness and tranquil calmness
about those I've lost, those I've grown to know, that which I've come to love,

I'm scarred, life get's harder as time passes,
my decisions create this butterfly effect that makes me second think everything,
but the good things keep me going,
the one good thing i have, her.

time is nothing but a timer that we can't simply add a quarter to
simply walk among the beaten once traveled path and try to see the track's that once were

Winter brings chill's down my spine as i think of her, think of her precious self essence ,
of her prosperity to laugh, be herself, to be loved, be free.
trees sway in the foreground tapping on my window as if to try and lend a helping ear to my troubled mind.
i reply back, I'm fine all i want is her.

This, this is what i feared for so long, giving in entirely, wanting to feel the pulse of this other soul connecting to mine, many don't understand because either there scared to admit they too wishfully dream of what I've found or they don't know what this feel's like.

matter's not, for tonight i drift off to my nirvana, the world i escape to where i can lie under the forest line, by the ever flowing river and passively explore my inner thoughts and emotion's. This place is mine, my soul's reflection upon my shadow allowing it to take form and sit with me. Life, i understand you now.

Celestial Endevour

As i play with the moon,
the sun interrupts & state's it's getting early,
go sleep, see u soon,
i refuse, turn the corner, vroom,
hide behind the star's that formed your silhouette
there i stood couldn't move,
speechless, eyes open, eohh,
body curve's interrupted my perception of what i was gonna do,
but instead convinced myself it's true,
your the woman i've been dreaming of, in my mind here i have proof,
look at this thing of you, looks like a picture.. wrong,
it's my notebook & it's something that i drew.
this might be out the blue,
but in my dream's your a goddess, and our love was something no one else knew,
we were happy, no one else pursued,
we were in our own little world we could love without rules,
Loving me, i loved you,
the way that it's supposed to be, life eternal mystery revealed upon you.

If this world were mine



If this world were mine id palm it,
transform it, mold it to a form of a blunt nd just smoke it,
in between the sheet's are some vine's,
vanilla flavored swift, lick's, flick, spark
let's go waste us some time.
smokin these trees leavin forest debris,
so i can gather my thought's nd see the reason why i fall at the knee's
see my brother loose his moms to disease, that's why i toke,
cause u never know when bomb's are bein dropped over me.


contact, count down to three,
inhale till i read braille that's the fact's of life high as i be
no one ever took the time to see,
just adding water doesn't grow the seed, it need's sunlight to breathe.
never look back, never a need,
hence why im takin over, fuck starch man i make my own beat's,
So sit back into your seat,
nd feel blessed ur allowed into my world when it's handed to me.




ask the all important questions,
who am i, where am i from nd why am i flya than a Jetson?
makin u wanna retreat,
came prepped with a mind from Shaolin, heart's always in Queens,
N.Y.C; city of dream's,
so much grass yet dreamers get they wig split findin that green
it attracts us like white to a feen,
but when u come from nothin, no's an answer that's hard to receive
so the bank's door im forging a key,
takin all im worth, which sincerely speaking im worth all that i see.
i might sound mad,maybe i am,
now sit back as this motha fuckin Planet's fuckin handed to me.




This is one of my project's im readily happy with, it took me a day to make the track & bar's, it start's right after the first breath you hear on the track.
Yes i made this beat, it's mine, Sampled marvin gaye-if this world were mine only for the intro & a few second's of the end. This goes from; 18 sec's to 1:34 leaving room for someone else, for when i decide to actually record again.

Link to beat.
http://www.sendspace.com/file/kzqo2i

More randomness



You know i fear sometimes, i fear that something so good is gonna get swiped from under my finger's. Your too good for me, and i honestly feel it was a blessing you were placed in my path. If i could show you how i see you in my mind you'd understand why i don't wanna let you go when your close to me.

Every moment happens in slow motion, every moment precisely calculated' yet foolishly spontaneous. having u inspired me to be better, better for u, better for us, better for me. Letters loose their significance and power when it come's to you, it's just my honest opinion. I wont take you for granted.. ever, i swear. Everyday i wake with a smile on my face because of you and i don't take it lightly; it's what i thrive on =]


The difference in this world between what's real, what feels right is dependent on us and only us. Let no one from the outside influence what you feel. The heart's thought process is what keep's the mind alive and prosper.

Random




I sit here and just have a million things floating in my head, a million things to say, a million things to change, how can u care for someone so much? in so little time? but it doesn't feel little, it feel's like an eternity. like you've known them forever, yet u know there's so much u need to learn.

I sit here conversating with myself, asking when will i see her again? soon i know.
Thing's keep us apart when were so close. i suffer when she's gone, this is normal, she's dug deep.

When all you can think about is her presence near you, her scent around you, her hand's holding you.

This is everything, i sometimes want everything, but all i want/need is her, it isint much to ask, im a simple person, i just feel lonely at time's, this really is normal, this is why i like writing, it's as if im talking to someone, even tho there's no one there at the moment, it's my therapy.

Gasping




Gasping for air, drowning in the sea,
mile's away from you, where your eye's cant see
& i know
what eye's reveal, the body giving way for the soul to feel

Tell me, what's going threw your mind
run to me when your heart's confused and blind
cause i am
everything you need
let me be your world & ill set you free



Taking my time to learn everything about you
take this life or death, these wall's seem to talk too
why do they insist, to lurk' it seems were haunted,
but it's me and you, everything i've wanted.
so ill stand to fight every single demon,
cause your sent from god & forever my reason.

Oh to stay alive;
to stay alive,
to stay alive,
to stay alive.


Gasping for air, drowning in the sea,
mile's away from you, where your eye's cant see
& i know
what eye's reveal, the body giving way for the soul to feel

Tell me, what's going threw your mind
run to me when your heart's confused and blind
cause i am
everything you need
let me be your world & ill set you free

Fire Dance




Center of attention; (Gasp) I remind myself to breathe, Stare into gleaming eye's, they're mine.

Walk around each other; no one else exist. You and i, i and you.

Touch my fingertip's, Bless your Soul, Mind, Heart & Appearance.

Playing game's, smile's, nudges, laughter. Silence; Forever begins.

We sit, i move, we kiss, Mind went into complete Enlightenment,
I've never experienced anything near this.

This moment, these moments are ours.

Passion refuses to be a proper word.
word's seem to fail at describing.
so fingertip's commence to write when your not around.

I've opened up completely,

now there is just time.

If you could see life the way i see it, the way i see these moment's, Life takes another meaning.

I am..

{Ghostface-lonely} Random




Don't you think your word's hurt?
every time u say that your leaving' for a reason,
that's like garbage' without worth?
Don't you think i wanna Love you?
With every bone in my body, i twist, turn,
waiting for you to call me.
Might i be Sprung? It's True but boo,
Am i something that special, you fear to loose
cause of the way that i kiss you?
or am i dirty baggage? i doubt it,
cause of the way that we click,
It's unheard of,
know that I'll never find it,

Pretend; that I'm out there just mackin,
talkin to every female i see,
like what you mean to me..girl isint Lavish.
I'll Pin fall, C'mon, Withdraw,
your last statement's
cause if you put mind to it,
You'll see i wasnt wrong.

Life's hard,
so we gotta make it work
9-5, full-time,
as i.. remove your shirt it's on,
forget about the trouble,
pop that bubble on my lap nd feel
­­­how i can work ya muscle's ,
into relaxation
after contact when i rush you,
made you blush too,
win-win always stay true.'

i include..
Since i met you, I've been nothin but New,
forward's a beautiful view,
feelin like hard time's behind me,
as long as I'm your Picasso.

I am He






You... yes you. The Flower blooming threw the thick ice and 12 feet of snow.

How? You broke past the cemented path uncovering a bare self no one had seen in a while.

Fragile state of Comfortableness i feared to reveal for reason's too stressful to uncover again
But you understand.

I've done this once before, Opened the door's to my mind to someone but it wasn't right.
Time wasn't right.
Air wansn't right.
Mood wasn't right
Moment wasn't right.
This is right.
This is everything.

May i be wrong? Yes.. am i? No

Complicated? Maybe, who's to say, but in this world of decay; Here lie's you.

Ever so reluctant to make a false move because you too fear loosing this game we play.
I reassure.. you will not loose.

I am he; You are Her. Mine, all mine. Here i am. He


*& on this note; Happy New Year's Eve

Letter He'll never read





He turn's to me and say's

"Son, your turning into a man, there are thing's u need to understand"

I glare with uncertainty, responding

"But you see father I'm already a man, i became one when i had to pick myself up that first time i fell learning to skate and all u did was stand there and yell"

You see i saw the future that day, i saw the Father i always had, turn into the man i wish i never met. Yes' he is my father and deserves such respect & he has that much from me. He is an honest man, hard worker, passionate, loves his family but like all old fashioned people he refuses to adjust to changing time's and also admit/give up when he's wrong.


i wish i didn't disappoint you so much, i wish i didn't somehow come between the relationship u and my mother had, i put a load on it. I became the center of many discussion's and topic's of conversations which never ended well. though i am at fault; i do not blame myself.

YOU drove yourself away from us, you had your chance to reclaim a family that was once yours. You chose to stay in Boston away from us when u could easily be living close by where Samuel could constantly see you and be with his father.



It's taking a tole..

we are all getting by just fine but we know deep down were breaking, Sometimes i think that if i hadn't become strong by watching my Mother be invincible i wouldn't be in the state of mind that I'm in, i love how i tick.

thing's change for the better and for the worse.

This is no longer a playground & my scar's have long but healed.