Day's feel harder.

I sat here by the innocence of my own company,
Dismembering myself,
Counting every blessing, every well given prosper thought,
Every situation that has led me to this moment,
I cried, i laughed, i pondered in great sadness and tranquil calmness
about those I've lost, those I've grown to know, that which I've come to love,

I'm scarred, life get's harder as time passes,
my decisions create this butterfly effect that makes me second think everything,
but the good things keep me going,
the one good thing i have, her.

time is nothing but a timer that we can't simply add a quarter to
simply walk among the beaten once traveled path and try to see the track's that once were

Winter brings chill's down my spine as i think of her, think of her precious self essence ,
of her prosperity to laugh, be herself, to be loved, be free.
trees sway in the foreground tapping on my window as if to try and lend a helping ear to my troubled mind.
i reply back, I'm fine all i want is her.

This, this is what i feared for so long, giving in entirely, wanting to feel the pulse of this other soul connecting to mine, many don't understand because either there scared to admit they too wishfully dream of what I've found or they don't know what this feel's like.

matter's not, for tonight i drift off to my nirvana, the world i escape to where i can lie under the forest line, by the ever flowing river and passively explore my inner thoughts and emotion's. This place is mine, my soul's reflection upon my shadow allowing it to take form and sit with me. Life, i understand you now.